From the distance comes the dull thud of a faraway explosion.
“Mayday, mayday!” a voice calls through the mist. “All hands on deck, all hands on deck!”
“Private!” roars one of the crew. “What’s happening?”
“The deadline, sir!” the fearful young man replies. “Coming hard and fast!”
The lieutenant curses under his breath. They’d already fended off two of the damned things; this third one caught them off guard. This is bad. He frowns, shakes his head. “How many words do we have?”
“800 and counting sir!”
“And how many do you think we’ll need?”
His eyes grow wide and fearful. “Thousands,” he whispers.
The lieutenant stumbles backwards. “We should have been prepared for this,” he mutters, shaking his head. “We should have been prepared!” he roars.
Another explosion sounds, this one closer.
“Sir… what do we do, sir?”
The lieutenant grabs the private by the collar. “By all the gods you believe in, boy, face all attention span dishes forwards! Do it now!”
“Sir! Yes sir!”
“But sir!” rings a new voice, panicked and fearful. Another private appears through the mist. “Sir, it’s Tuesday!”
“What of it?” he growls.
“We… we have no blog post prepared…”
The lieutenant swears under his breath again, then stops to consider a course of action. “We’ll have to leave it,” he mumbles eventually. “We have to prioritize.”
“But sir… we haven’t missed a Tuesday for months, bar the scheduling incident…”
The lieutenant wrestles with himself for a moment, and then spits. “Fine!” he snaps. “I’ll spare you less than 300 words. But be hasty!” he adds. “Be hasty, lest we all sink to the pits of damnation!”
“Sir,” the private replies, shaken. “Yes sir.”
The private leaves. The lieutenant marches ahead. “Onwards!” he roars.
***
Alright, yes, I know, that was dumb and cheesy. I apologise for this blog post being what it is, but sometimes, we need to prioritise. Blog posts will continue as scheduled from Thursday onwards.
Perpetually Perturbed 